My Aura Reading: “You are Guided.” (Goal #37)

So, my apologies about not writing this sooner, as I was in Sedona, AZ 2 weeks ago to complete goal #37- getting my aura read!

Actually, getting my aura re-read. Let me explain how all of this started. About 3 years ago, my friend and I visited Sedona for the first time. If you’re unfamiliar, it’s a beautiful place about 2 hours north of Phoenix; known for it’s energy, healing powers, and beautiful geography. (I LOVE Red Rock Canyon.) Some people may call it “hippy-dippy.” And I would agree. And that’s why I love it!

While we were there, we saw a place called “Center for the New Age.” We thought, “What would be the most hippy-dippy thing we could do while we’re here?” So, a few weeks beforehand, we scheduled an aura-reading. This is a photo you take that “captures” your energy and can assist you in aligning your chakras. Now, do I know what that really means? No. But I’m open-minded.

They scheduled us a meeting with a woman named Jamie. I had no idea going in how FREAKING AWESOME this chick would be. Funny, intelligent, down-to-earth, gifted, on-point, and really, really cool. She’s one of those people you look at and think, “Why aren’t we friends?”

My first reading was in January 2011. (Below, left) I was in debt, depressed, stuck, and had just launched “LeavingMilpitas.com” as a way to get out of my parent’s house and out of debt. The second picture (right) was taken in April of 2012. I was a month into my new job at Star 101.3, had moved out of Milpitas and into a new apartment, and was out of debt. (Until I furnished my new apartment. Then I was f***ed again.)

It’s less than a year later, but I had to go back. I’ve felt more connected to myself within the last 2 months than I have my entire life. (That will be in the next blog. And trust me…it’s gonna be good.) The one thing she said that made me so, so happy was, “Girl, you’re guided.”

New aura photo. The white circle in the center is actually my “heart” chakra, which is in a transitional phase as I’m just beginning to be ready to let someone in. The white light is right over my face/crown chakra. (Also, forgive the darkness; my scanner didn’t work so I had to take this photo with my cell phone! #janky)

She was right. I really am in a place in a place where I’m ready to share, ready to inspire, and ready to stop being in my own way. This is the first time in my entire life that I have ever felt this way.

What the colors mean….

Jamie’s personal notes….seeing “spiritual teacher” and “use humor” side by side has made SO many things make sense to me. Also, the only thing I got out of the meditation CD was comedy notes….

And here’s Jamie. Remind me to also turn to my side if I’m standing next to someone who’s 96 pounds AND taking pictures from the side. (On another note, isn’t she pretty?)

Other highlights include:

* Taking a bubble bath 2 nights in a row at my hotel!! (the bathtub in my apartment is child-size, I swear.)

* An AMAZING meal at Elote: “Camarones con Espinacas” (grilled shrimp w/a spinach-chipotle cream sauce) AND a ginger AND prickly pear margarita. Yes, 2 margaritas. Suck it.

* An AMAZING smoked chopped salmon salad at The Barking Frog Grille.

*Working out 2 days in a row. Really proud of myself for this.

* Visiting Chapel of the Holy Cross. Amazingly beautiful. Do it if you can.

* And… a 2 hour UFO tour!! This was the coolest thing I’ve ever done. We went to the top of a mountain (in between several vortexes) and watched the sky through super fancy night-vision goggles for 2 hours. I saw 7 UFOs. I can’t wait to do this again. I went with Melinda from Center from the New Age.

Is this badass or IS THIS BADASS??

Not bad for 2 days. Next time I hope to be there longer. I want to work in an extensive hike, a bike-ride, more hippy-dippy and raw foods, maybe a spa day, etc. (Ah, money. If only there were more of it!) If you’ve ever been to Sedona, or done anything I’ve mentioned in this blog, I’d love to hear about it! Thanks for reading and special thanks to Jamie and Melinda for making this a wonderful, memorable weekend!

Love,

Sandy

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I Met a Weatherman! (Goal #42)

Okay, before I post anything, I feel like I need to acknowledge my guilty conscience.

A couple months ago I was SO stoked to re-brand this website with a more positive message and new goals. And I really thought, “Okay, now that I have all these goals up, I have to accomplish them! Like, now! Or within 1-2 years max!”

So, what happened? I stopped caring about my goals. Well, it’s not that I stopped “caring.” I just got caught up in a bunch of really important, life-changing, transformational other stuff. (It all started at a Tony Robbins seminar. That will be another blog. ) So, as the saying goes, “Life’s what happens when you’re making plans.”

That being said….let’s talk about the coolest thing I’ve done in a long time: I met an effing weatherman! I don’t know why, but I find what they do fascinating. I love the idea of a green screen turning into neat graphics of high-and-low pressure. I love the clicker thing they have to change the graphics. I love knowing when it’s going to rain, or storm. And I love that THEY love it too!

My friend Kelly Rice, who’s a program-director at KESP, made it all happen. I met her 3 years ago backstage at an Adam Lambert concert. Both being sarcastic, outspoken radio people, we hit it off. So on Saturday night, she took me to Fox 40 in Sacramento to meet her friend, Dennis Shanahan.

Within the first 10 minutes, he said, “Okay, I’m going to have you help me create a 7-day forecast.” I was like, “Are you SHITTING ME?? THIS IS AMAZING!!”

Weather is intense.

Do you know what this is? This is HIS CLICKER! I felt so powerful holding it. (Good God I’m too perverted for my own posts.)

My favorite part of the day might have been Dennis’s fascination with the Fujita Scale.

“Sometimes, if you’re a lucky, a bird will fly across the screen.”

The Fox 40 studios

You couldn’t tell, but it was partly cloudy with a chance of drizzle.

Dennis and co-anchor, Tia Ewing. It was adorable watching them go back and forth between the commercial breaks! Reminded me a lot of radio.

Btw, look at her FABULOUS shoes! I told her they should have their own segment. #Fierce

Dennis and I at his weather center. Neat!

Again, special thanks to Dennis, Kelly, the Fox 40 studios and anyone and everyone reading this blog. I appreciate it! I might even add “storm-chasing” to my list…..

Sandy

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First goal out of 50 achieved: ZIPLINING!

Well, I finally did it: I went ziplining!

I’ve always wanted to do this. And to be honest with you, I always thought it would be somewhere tropical, cause that’s what most people do. But then I discovered ziplining in the mountains, about 20 minutes outside of Vegas.

Are you SHITTING ME? Desert landscape, achieving a goal, buffets AND penny slots??

I went to Flightlinez Bootleg Canyon, in Boulder City. Prior to going, I’d researched online, contacted their marketing manager, Brina, and mentally prepped myself for the weigh-in.

YES. There’s a weigh-in. You have to make a 250-pound weight limit to be able to fly. (Have I mentioned I’ve skipped my Weight-Watcher meetings for the last 2 months?) Now, to be fair, I’m nowhere near 250. But I’m 40 pounds heavier than I was 4 years ago. That’s a lot of extra weight to be carrying around. (Physically and mentally) God BLESS Ryan, their operations manager, who was so sweet and kind dealing with my neuroses about this. It was really bad that day. At one point I said, “Just do whatever you need to do to make me look thin.” He said, “I think you’re doing a pretty good job of that yourself.”

And at that point, I wanted to marry him.

The next 30 minutes were basic instructions on how to handle the “landing.” You know, simple things like “flags up = use your breaks”, “flags flailing = SLOW THE F**K DOWN” and “flags down = release breaks, legs out.” I’m gonna be real honest here and say these instructions scared the SHIT out of me. I know there were only 3. But that was 3 too many. I thought you just sat down, slide down a mountain, and landed. I didn’t know there was coordination and learning and shit.

Anyway…..here’s the video. My nerves got the best of me on the first one. The last 3 were a little better. (only 2 are on the video as the tape ran out!)
 

All in all, it was crazy exhilarating. Thank you SO MUCH to the entire staff of Flightlinez Bootleg Canyon. Brina, congrats on finding what you truly love and helping me make this happen! Mercedes- you are spunky and sarcastic- never change. Andrew- for the love of GOD please share your talents with the world; and remember, “the world is your shuttle-bus.” Ashley, you are super cool and take amazing pictures. You also make me miss all the hot hobo dudes in Portland. And Ryan, thanks for your patience, professionalism, and treating me like a lady. See you guys on a sunset flight!

And….here’s some more pics from my trip.

Me, at the top

With Ryan.

That’s $988.80 on a PENNY SLOT!!!

Notice the holiday band in the background?  Me neither.

Kind of sad when everything you love in life is summed up in one elevator at the Four Queens.

This made my heart happy. Didn’t even go to sleep the last night just to see the sunrise in Red Rock Canyon at 6am. Totally worth it.

Thank you for reading!

Love,

Sandy

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So, I Posted a “Casual Encounter” ad on Craigslist.

First of all, I need to state that I’m slightly embarrassed that this is the blog I chose to write after so much time has gone by, and so many amazing things have happened in my life. Believe me, I’ve been sitting on words and gratitudes for the last few months; waiting for the appropriate time to address you, to address myself, and to acknowledge that what I’ve been through is nothing short of a complete spiritual rebirth.

And I will get to that. But first, I need to talk about ass.

So, Saturday night my friends and I were having some wine.  This comes after a day in Napa, where we also drank wine. Sure, we could we have gone out to a bar or a movie, or somewhere typical “young” people go on a Saturday night. But we decided to stay in, get in our jammies, watch shitty youtube videos, and create an ad for me on Craigslist “casual encounters.”

Keep in mind, this was purely for entertainment purposes. Never did I think we would get 40+ RESPONSES! Literally every time we clicked “refresh”, another one was in our inbox. Some were funny, some dirty, some creative, and some….I actually thought were really good guys. Which bodes the question: should I actually contact the ones that were kind of cute?

Anyway, here’s the ad. (Click to enlarge.) Here’s the link to it on CL as well, which may expire soon.

Hat’s off to the only 3 men who actually sent me pictures of their dinner.

This was submitted by “A”, a 20-something Italian boy from SF. Well done! Boy can cook!

Bonus points to “Organic Tofu Guy”, who not only posted this picture but ALSO asked what kind of cupcake I was having. (Buttercream, from Buttercream Bakery in Napa)

This was sent to me by someone who either loves googling cool-looking dishes, or has a really fancy camera. (Btw, this was a “tagine of monkfish, potatoes, cherry tomatoes and olives.” ??)

Pictures I couldn’t post, but worth mentioning:

* Photo of a guy holding a puppy. (Good marketing!)

* 3 separate photos of guys showing their abs in the bathroom mirror.

* Photo of a guy drunk, and pissing on a wall in Alcatraz.

* Photo of guy’s junk, from 2 different angles.

* Photo of a guy on a sailboat (somewhere in the Bay) looking RIDICULOUSLY cute. This is the one that actually made me think, “Shit. Should I contact him?” (I’m actually still thinking about him.)

And then, there were responses from men whose identities I’ve protected by giving them clever titles.

Too Honest Guy:

“I ate pasta- way too much. I started with dessert and now I’ve got glucose issues. I’m super-safe. I double up on the condoms and will lick the crumbs off your pillow if you’d like. Btw, can we just be friends? Or at least visit Mr S or GV first? I’m using a dental dam but now I can’t remember what side is clean (is it okay to reuse them?) So anyway, hit me up.”

Um…can anyone tell me what a “Mr S or GV” visit is??

Creepy guy:

“Normally I would open this by showing you what I had for dinner but a) I ate it already and b) I haven’t pooped it out yet. I’m funny and will easily out-joke you with witty puns that will make you cringes. If you’re lucky I will say borderline creepy things while we’re in bed like “mmmmm….perfect” while prodding some remote part of your body. I LOVE emulating dog sniffing into people’s ears as a form of endearment and cuteness. If this sounds like your idea of a wild Saturday night, write me back. Until then I’ll be aggressively pressing F5 on my inbox.”

Angry-at-ex-guy:

“I’m sitting here in a hotel. My ex gf is at my townhome probably having drunken sex with random guys in a bed I bought…she called the police and told them my car was stolen and had it toed, she also just got me fired from my job. Can’t wait to find a new place and get my stuff out of my townhome before she gets thrown out. I want my deposit and stuff back. Sorry for rambling on. U shouldn’t have to masturbate on a Saturday night.”

Biker Young Guy:

“I’m usually a switch, but it depends on the partner. Submissive girls will get the dominant side more quickly. Maybe I can be your dinner sometime.”

He also let me know he had pierced nipples, rides an old motorcycle, and has a 7 inch Johnson with a “6 inch circumference at the middle.”

And now, my top 5 favorite quotes!

“Saw 007 last night and I masturbated to the asian girl….wasn’t she pretty?”

“What really interests me about your ad is your mention of a backless onesie. What exactly is it, and why am I so weirdly interested?”

“I have an idea for tonight. I will start with a wonderful tantric massage. This is a slow sensual massage with long flowing strokes. This ends with an exquisite pussy massage.”

EXQUISITE?! LOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Bummer as I was hoping for a majestic labia blessing. )

“I loved your post and sense of humor about it all. Maybe the sexiest thing you can do is just be funny.”

“You’re really funny! Do you have skype? Look me up under this email address right now. Super horny and pretty stoned. We can chat and maybe I can stroke my cock on cam for you at some point?”

And this guy gets creativity points for the funniest name.

“Hi there. Loved your ad. My dinner is long gone, but I’m sure you’ve seen a burrito before.” -Tall, Hot, and Hung for Crumbs

Thanks for reading!

Sandy

 

 

 

 

 

 

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BIG NEWS!

On Monday, March 5th,  I will begin mornings on Star 101.3 in San Francisco! It is an HONOR to have this opportunity and I couldn’t be more excited.

More news, blogs, and updates to come. :)

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Adam Lambert Interview!!

Last week, I had the incredible opportunity to interview Adam Lambert- again.

It came out of nowhere and was very last minute, as he had an appearance at Google and was only in the Bay Area 24 hours. He was doing radio the following morning, and we were the only ones granted on-camera access that night. It was amazing. Adam is one of those people who’s energy is so infectious, you wish you could bottle it up and take it around with you daily. He is so passionate about life. Incredibly gifted, down to earth, funny, and just good people. We would all marry him if we could!

In the interview, we discussed his new album, “Trespassing”, relationships, juicing, and his future plans. Also….if you’re confused with my “tunic” comment at the end, I’d mentioned to him off-camera that I was self-conscious about my weight, and my life has basically turned into “a giant tunic top.” He laughed and I said, “life is a tunic!” and somehow, he remembered that and quoted it at the end of the interview. Enjoy!


 

 

 

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Kitchen Questions from a Clueless Non-Cook.

Housewives, healthy-people, and neat-freaks: I need your help.

Soon, I will be moving. “But why haven’t you already moved, Sandy?” Simmer down, judgey. It’s not that simple. Yes, I got out of debt last summer. Then, I saved some money so I wouldn’t go into debt again. Then, I had several job relocation possibilities that complicated things (my company was aware and extremely supportive) and then, the holidays happened.

So here I am. Buying things for a kitchen I don’t have and an apartment I don’t live in. But come on- aren’t they adorable?

Matching “mug” bowl and plate from of Castello di Amorosa, Napa. Hand-painted olive-oil dispenser from V. Sattui, Napa.

Having my own place isn’t just a “finally-leaving-Milpitas-and-being-on-my-own” fantasy. It’s the freedom and peace of mind to finally focus on my health. I want get back to a place where I feel in control. Where I can stop hating my body, being self-conscious, and making smarter decisions. I want to feel young again. Living at home makes this nearly impossible. I know, ultimately, I am the one who’s responsible for what I eat/don’t eat, what exercise I do/don’t do, etc. But to be perfectly honest with you…..when I’m home, I just don’t care. I don’t see a reason to care.

That being said, I’ll let you in on another fear of mine: the kitchen. I don’t cook. I can make sandwiches, and a few things from Trader Joe’s. Once I made a couscous recipe from the back of a box (with chicken, basil leaves, chopped peppers, etc) and I felt like fucking Emeril Lagasse. And even when I do “cook”, it’s a mess. I think to myself, “How does everyone else seem to know what they’re doing?”

So, to calm my nerves, I’ve written a list of simple questions that I somehow don’t know the answer to, but I’m sure you do. (I even I told my friend about this blog and she straight-up laughed at me.) Any suggestions, links, or advice is appreciated. You can answer here or send an email to: sandy(at)sandystec(dot)com.

* How do I dispose of meats properly?

* What materials are best for cleaning counter tops?

* Should I avoid using sponges all together?

* Can you recommend any natural products to use?

* What fruits are okay out of the fridge and for how long?

* How can I keep my fridge smelling fresh?

* What should I clean the floors with? (I HATED doing this when I lived on my own. Guess I’ll have to get used to it again…)

* How do I keep the trash smelling clean, or odorless?

* Can you leave juices uncovered in the fridge?

* What materials are unsafe and shouldn’t be used in the kitchen?

Additionally, I will take any healthy recipes you have. I have a Weight Watchers food scale and Jack LaLanne juicer sitting in a box at home because there’s no counter-space in the kitchen. But when I move, I’m eager to make these a part of my daily life!

Thanks in advance for your support and suggestions!

Love,

Sandy

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For 2 Hours, I Felt My Heart Again.

Last night was incredible.

It was one of those nights where you look at whoever’s sitting next to you and say, “I can’t believe we’re lucky enough to be here right now.”

I was at the Throckmorton Theatre in Mill Valley to see Kelly Carlin- George Carlin’s daughter- perform her one-woman show, “A Carlin Home Companion: Life, Love and Laughter with  my Father George.”

I learned of this last minute, on Saturday, and was hesistant on going. Why? Because I’m an asshole, and I’m lazy. Driving 1.5 hours on a Sunday night seemed like a lot. But I decided to go anyway, as I wasn’t sure when I’d have this opportunity again. As fate would have it, I carpooled with my good friend Jeff Applebaum, a comedian I’ve known for 10 years who’s always been by my side. We’ve been wanting to carpool to the Throck for a few months but haven’t been able to coordinate it. And just as life would have it, everything is better when it’s last minute and unplanned.

The car ride was nice. Felt like it was only 15 minutes. We talked about everything, from recent gigs to future gigs, to auditions, fears, and frustrations; to accomplishments and everything in between. It’s nice to have a great person to bounce thoughts off of, especially considering I’ve been really alone in my thoughts lately. And at the risk of sounding redundant, being alone in your thoughts is, well, lonely.

The second we parked the car, I knew it was going to be a special night. Outside of the theatre was Dan Dion- an infamous SF photographer, and Paul Provenza, comedian and host of “The Green Room with Paul Provenza.” He was there to film and support Kelly.

There was a buzz inside, I could feel it. The show was starting in 5 minutes. Robin Williams talked amongst friends, as did Mort Sahl, Mark Pitta, Tom Sawyer, and other comedians. I saw about 5 comedians I knew personally, and that was really nice. The world is a little less lonely when you can commiserate with your own.

At 8:05pm, the show started. I didn’t know what to expect. I’ve never met Kelly, though I’ve only heard amazing things about her. I’ve seen her father twice (in Vegas) read Brain Droppings, and watched a couple HBO specials. Other than that, I’m not a novice. I more thought it was cool to know the only living heir of George Carlin was going to talk openly about her life with him.

Within 45 minutes, I was transported to a place I haven’t been in a long, long time: my heart. God, her vulnerability. And courage. And honesty. I watched her in awe, learning so much not only about her life as a woman and child of George Carlin, but of Carlin himself; as a father, a friend, a comedian, and most importantly, a human. Flaws, outbursts, drugs, fears, and all.

It was heart-breaking and humbling. From her stories of drug experimentation and parenting her parents, to breaking free of Hollywood labels, to dating the wrong guys and finding spirituality, to finding work that redeemed her….what resignated with me most was that throughout it all, she was just a woman who was trying to find herself in this world. As am I.

I watched as her honesty captivated the crowd; with every last detail attatching to any unclaimed heartstring in the room. She had us all in the palm of her hand. And we wanted to be there. Because that’s where the truth was.

And I watched her wallow in it, speak it, relive it, and be in it. And it was beautiful.

Tears fell from eyes. I tried to stop them, but after a while I just didn’t care. I wanted to cry. I needed it. I’ve needed it a lot lately, to be honest. Hearing her truths made me miss my own. I’ve missed feeling like I was connected to something. I’ve missed feeling like I have a purpose. I’ve missed feeling aligned with the Universe. (Hippy speak for “moving up.”) I used to be so focused, so excited about upcoming gigs. I never used to say “I used to be.” I miss “in her element” Sandy. You know, sarcastic. Quick. Focused. Fearless. Creative. Compassionate. And honest.

I haven’t felt that in a long time. But for 2 hours…I did.

Thank you, Kelly.

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Red Carpet “Puss in Boots” Interview!

Here’s my red-carpet interview with Antonio Banderas and Salma Hayek for the “Puss in Boots” screening in San Francisco. Enjoy!

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Love, Support, and Sugar-Highs.

Wow. I really felt the love yesterday.

I also felt some indigestion, but that’s another story. It was my 3rd “Leaving Milpitas” show, this time at Bunjo’s Comedy Club in Dublin. I made it a point when getting booked that I really didn’t want to make this show a big deal. I stressed out BIGTIME with my first two shows (making/showing videos at the show gave me severe anxiety) so I said this time, no videos. Just straight comedy.

A few weeks before the show, Psycho Donuts called me. In case you’re unaware, I LOVE them. Their creativity, their uniqueness, and of course, their donuts. We’ve worked together on some fun videos before. We even made a mock “Milpitas” donut with kimchi, seaweed flakes, and other disgusting ingredients. (Purely for shock value.)

After I made my fundraising goal of $10,000 in May, Psycho Donuts offered to make a real Milpitas donut that they would sell in their store for one day only. Well, that day was yesterday. And it was AWESOME.

Chocolate donut, chocolate frosting, chocolate filling. Various bits of “trash” (graham crackers, sprinkles, oreo cookies, etc) on the sides, and a giant “M” on the top. We named it, “The Milpitas Monster.” (Not to disrespect the real “Milpitas Monster”, a movie my high-school teacher, Robert Burrill, made back in 1975!)

I told everyone who bought a donut to send me a picture. I also brought donuts to the show for the audience. Check out the pics!

The “Milpitas Monster”for sale at Psycho Donuts in Campbell!

And….for sale at Psycho Donuts in San Jose! (Thanks, Bill!)

A young girl holds a box of donuts. Milpitas Monster made the cut!

This picture almost made me weep- my friend Jennifer (who I’ve known since childhood) took a picture of her two kids with it!

My friend April is hesitant and artsy at the same time. You RULE!

And Bill…who did an ENTIRE photoshoot and video with the donut. AWESOME!

And low and behold, my friend B.J. got the LAST one!

Thank you guys for sending me those pics!! Now, some from the “Leaving Milpitas” show at Bunjo’s.

Happy couples embrace the donut/diabetes.

An action shot…..who says donuts are limited to one per person?

This was my favorite part of the night. My friends from high school- who I haven’t seen since we graduated- came to the show. I almost cried. It really meant a lot to me to see them there. Thank you guys for the support! (Lawrence, myself, Nasser, Matt and Lynn.)

And of course, a very BIG thank you to my friends and comedians who performed with me that night! Tina, Patrick, and John- thank you!!!

Thank you ALL for supporting me through this journey. I am not leaving Milpitas yet….but I am closer than I’ve ever been. I am forever grateful for the memories I will take with me when I go.

And as always, an extended thank you to the staff of Psycho donuts- Web and Jordan, Chef Ron, and awesome nurses Aleen, Taren, and Dylan. You guys are crazy and creative. Never change.

Okay. Back to the treadmill. I’m starting to feel like this chick. (Taken after the show.)

Love,

Sandy

P.S. Click HERE for a special video of the making of the “Milpitas Monster” donut!

 

 

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